The Joke's on you
by RogueCajun
Summary: The Joker is back in Arkham, but their little game was far from over. In fact, phase two was just beginning. Sequel to Greatest joke of all. AU as of The Dark Knight Rises. ON HOLD
1. Prologue: Know thy enemy

Title: The Joke's on you  
By: RogueCajun  
Rating: Pg-13.  
Disclaimer: **The Dark Knight** © Chris Nolan  
**Batman & all related characters** © DC  
**Smallville** © WB  
Summary: The Joker is back in Arkham but how long will he stay there this time? Sequel to Greatest joke of all.  
Timeline: Prologue is set directly after the events of "Greatest Joke of all".  
A/n: My version of Harley (when she actually shows up) is heavily, and repeating it for emphasis—**heavily** based on this version here:

.com/watch?v=5TNNWyOxz4c

Because that entire series is BRILLIANT. And I just adore it.

* * *

**Prologue: Know thy enemy**

* * *

The Joker was on his way back to Arkham Asylum. This should have put Bruce Wayne's mind at ease. It didn't in fact, it only succeeded in making him even edgier—The Joker knew that he was Batman. It was bad enough having that demented clown know his identity, but if he told any of the other occupants whom the Bat put away all hell would break loose. Bruce wasn't sure the people he cared about could handle that type of hell; the Batman could, there were few things the Batman couldn't handle, but Alfred and Dick…Bruce was more than a little bit worried about the two of them.

"_Do I really look like a guy with a plan?"_ The Joker had asked Harvey Dent. Harvey, heh. Now that guy had a true psychopath lurking just under the surface; then again, didn't most politicians? He had a lot of fun pulling Gotham's white knight down to his level. It hadn't taken much, just a few drums of gasoline and a little speech about the nature of chaos. He had anticipated it being much harder, he was looking forward to wearing down the District Attorney. He had hoped for more of a challenge. Truth be told he was a _teensy_ bit disappointed in dear old Harvey. He had been so easy to turn but he had so much potential and he wasted it. It was time to turn his attention to his next plaything.

The art of turning someone to "the dark side" (he smirked at the turn of phrase—it made him sound like some sort of Saturday morning cartoon villain; he'd like to live in a world where children's show villains were just as twisted as him.) was a delicate operation. Take his doctor at Arkham for instance– he had been working on her since before his last escape. She was a crucial part of his new plan. True, he wasn't usually the type to plan—being an agent of chaos became difficult whenever one sat down and planned it all out. However, the Batman _was_ a planner. To beat a nemesis that one was the antithesis of one had to truly understand them, and to do that one had to think like them; so that's what he was doing now: getting inside the head of his good friend Batsy.

He was going to make this city remember why they needed the Batman and then he was going to laugh as the Batman let them all down.


	2. Chapter 1: The cat, the bat and

Title: The Joke's on you  
By: RogueCajun  
Rating: Pg-13.  
Disclaimer: **The Dark Knight** © Chris Nolan  
**Batman & all related characters** © DC  
**Smallville** © WB  
Summary: The Joker is back in Arkham but how long will he stay there this time? Sequel to Greatest joke of all.  
Timeline: Chapter 1 set three months after Greatest joke of all. (For those of you keeping track: that means it is January.)  
A/n: I thought it was appropriate that Gotham be pummeled with snow, just like most of the rest of the US.

My Catwoman is a mix of Batman Returns, the comics and the 60's Batman. (Julie Newmar specifically).

* * *

**Chapter One: The cat, the bat and the snowpocalypse. **

* * *

The first snow of winter had fallen in Gotham City, blanketing everything in several layers of crisp, clean, and pure snow. As if the city, no longer able to stand the filth that had tarnished it had cried out for help from above and the heavens had answered the plea, pouring out their frozen tears in an attempt to wash the sins of the city away.

Dick Grayson had a bad case of cabin fever, and not the creepy flesh-eating kind—no, that would've at least saved him from the agony of being cooped up in Wayne Manor. He had been out of school all week on account of the snow, and all of the other kids in Gotham were out building snowmen and sledding and doing all the things kids were supposed to do when they had a few snow days; but _nooo_ not Dick. 'It's not safe out there' Bruce had told him. Dick thought that was a load of bull because if it was so dangerous then why were other kids allowed to go out? Besides, Dick could totally take care of himself; he had thought the incident at Halloween had proven that. Apparently danger and snowstorms had no effect on the business of billionaires as Bruce had gone out for the day. Which was totally unfair!

Batman was perched atop Wayne Tower—it was the tallest building in the city and had the best view of the frozen wasteland of Gotham. The criminal element of Gotham was out in full force, ready to take advantage of those who dared to venture out. Batman didn't usually put in an appearance during the daylight hours, usually he was sleeping. Although lately he had been using the late afternoon and early evening hours to spend time with Dick. The kid was a handful to say the least, always bobbin' along and into everything. But with all the snow the Police department was stretched thin, they needed all the help they could get. An alarm went off in the distance and Batman sprang into action, heading off in the direction of the alarm.

* * *

**Elsewhere in Gotham****—–**

Two security guards working at Shreck's department store (having been forced to brave the snow and come into work under pain of death) were met with a strange sight: a woman in a black leather outfit had broken into the building and was stealing the jewelry from the jewelry counter. Her head snapped up when she heard then draw closer, she had on yellow tinted goggles that made her eyes appear larger than normal. "Hello boys." She purred. She had picked today to rob the store because she figured that most sensible people would be at home with the amount of snow they had received. She was surprised at first to see the two guards but on second thought she realized that Max Shreck was the type of bastard who'd force his employees to work during a snowstorm. She wasn't worried though, she could handle them.

"What are you supposed to be sweetheart?" the first guard asked. He left his taser in the holster, there was no way this woman was dangerous.

"Yeah, isn't it a little late for Halloween costumes?" the second one added. She smiled as she slinked towards them.

"I'm the anti-Claus," she said quietly as she leaned in close to the first guard. She moved so quickly that the guard didn't even notice she had taken the taser from its holster until it was too late. The man began to twitch and fell to the floor a moment later. "Here to take back everything you don't deserve." She finished, kicking the other guard into the wall—he didn't get back up. She turned her attention back to the jewelry counter, scooping up more of its contents and placing them in the bag that hung at her waist. This was her fifth robbery this week and there had been no sign of the Batman. She was a little disappointed; she had sooo looked forward to continuing their little game of cat and winged rodent. She was intrigued by him, the city despised him and yet he still fought to protect the very people who hated him. And he had let her go the last time they had met, she wasn't sure why. When she had cleaned out the counter skipped down to the paint aisle and plucking a can of black spray paint from the shelf she drew a black cat head on the white wall, signing it 'xoxo'. There, now Batman would know she left it for him.

* * *

They had two feet of snow fall in the past week with more on the way; Gordon was glad that Batman was out there to help, even if he had to elude the cops even more than usual now. The Joker was back behind bars now and it appeared that he would stay there this time but there was someone new in town—someone who dressed like a cat and liked to rob from Max Shreck. As Batman was public enemy no. 1 and he was the police commissioner he couldn't be seen dealing with him. So he had no way of knowing whether or not the Batman knew of this new villain or not. He had wanted nothing more than to stay home with his wife and children today. To help Jimmy build a snowman in the shape of Batman, to sip hot chocolate with his daughter on the front porch, but he had responsibilities. Someone had robbed a bank in downtown Gotham. As he arrived at the scene he didn't fail to notice Batman on the roof—he must have arrived before the police and just managed to slip out as they arrived.

At first glance the scene looked like a standard robbery. However, upon closer inspection Batman discovered that only one safe deposit box had been broken into and inside the box was a note. Usually he wouldn't take evidence but as he didn't have immediate access to anything the police found he decided to take it with him.


End file.
